This is my last attempt at finding an answer, my last call for help.
When I was 10 years old I was convinced there was a presence. Coming from a hardcore christian family, "ghosts don't exist." one night, something came. It hit me hard in the face leaving a mark. I was told I had a nightmare and hurt myself in my dreams. But I knew. And from that day on, I could feel it. Anytime I close my eyes when i'm alone, and any time i'm in the dark alone. Sometimes I open my eyes in the shower when I can feel it close and the curtains are coming at me as if something is on the other side. When it comes when i'm sleeping, I see it in my dreams and I become paralyzed, and I know it's right there in the room with my body. I force my body to make a noise so someone will wake me up. The fear it brings to me is unreal, and at 23 I'm becoming frightened to my very core. Recently, out of anger in a dream I told the figure I was going to let it get me, I would refuse to give in to fear and let whatever was going to happen, happen. And since then it appears much more. It has no real figure, its just a dark haze with a faint human-like outline. I've tried therapists, they tell me its "myself" i'm running from, but I can tell you its not. I know how to face my personal demons, and this is not one of them. I had my head scanned at 18 and a huge mental evaluation just to, you know, make sure it's not a tumor or schizophrenia.
I finally broke down and told my boyfriend of over 3 years this secret and he of course cannot understand and just suggested another brain scan.
I'm not crazy, I am scared and SOMETHING is with me.
I can't get myself to actually let it get me, I always run scared to where there's people around or light.
I'm tired of these constant nightmares, and i'm tired of the unknown.
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