Sometimes I feel all this negative energy. It's not even negative it's just unpleasant. Like when you hug someone who is in pain or crying although you are happy to help them, it feels like afterward all their bad emotions have rubbed off on you and it's like wearing an old shirt you desperately want to take of but can't because it needs to run it's course?
So where is all this nagging energy coming from? Touching certain fabrics causes it to appear and washing them doesn't do any good. Like the blankets that come with our student housing I can't even stand to look at because of the color or something about them that bothers me so much! The cold walls are horrible and DRAIN my energy. Arranging my bedroom fung shui helps sleeping a bit, I still can't stand that room though. Where is all of this negative energy coming from? The words "hollow" and "nagging" come to mind. How should I cope with it?
But living with roommates is the biggest horror. I'd like to love them but we don't get along, it feels like I'm completely discarded from the group because I don't fit in. I prefer not to hand out at bars or stay up and drink (yuk) until the next day or gossip, I hate it- drives me crazy! I try to ignore it, but knowing someone is somewhere in the apartment with you is distracting in itself.
And off-topic,I'm wondering if anyone can relate? I've always gravitated to older people who I can possibly see as role models (I'm 17) and they're always surprised I'm ten years younger or so... I don't fit in ever with my age group, except for friends from childhood, why? I'd like to though. Regarding the living space, how do I cope with it? Any comments, ideas I would absolutely love to hear, similarities, anything, it would be really great! Thank you! -Anna