I have tried researching this immensely to no avail, and I just want clarification. I still haven't found an answer or anything close. Anyway, I get into moods where I'm a totally different person. I have had people tell me that my persona and even my vibes aren't like my usual. When I am in this mood, I am hateful, power-hungry, and cold, and I say and do things that any normal being would almost never think of doing- and don't take me lightly when I say that. I become distant, and it is almost like I don't have any compassion. I know that I can somehow tap out of it when I realize I am in that space, but like I said, I am power-hungry during it and it gives me a sense of superiority, so I don't. When I am my normal self, I can feel a foreign energy. It is not terribly strong- I have to slightly focus on it to feel it. I sound insane, I know, but this has gone on for as long as I remember and I just want to know what it is. I feel it just below my heart, and like I mentioned prior, there's energy coming from it. If I try to envision it, then I see a black swirling circle. I know that it has to be linked to my moods, and I know I feel something. I meditate and use mudras, and it has eased it a small bit. I am not depressed or schizophrenic or currently diagnosed with any mental or physical disability if that helps. If nothing else, is there any way I could safely tap into this energy normally? I am open to any suggestions.
Thank you to anybody who answers! Much love and light, xoxo.