I am a pretty tough person, only until I am beyond afraid. It doesn't really matter what I am doing but sometimes I am so afraid of nothing. I fear to dream because I see the future many times. The other night I had a dream of just standing there in darkness and a wave of utter fear swept over me until I was basically drowning in it. I couldn't speak or scream for help, I couldn't think. The fear was so thick that I could almost cut through it.
I pray for comfort, especially for the fortune telling nightmares. I dreamed of a massive tornado and the next day I found out a friend of the family was next to one at night. I can't not feel fear or any emotion, and I don't know why. I live in fear for some reason even though there is nothing to be afraid of. Why is this?
Sometimes I can just stand in my room and hear noises, strange inhuman sounds and then I am paralyzed by fear. I don't know of others like this and I really want to know why I am so afraid of just nothing. It doesn't make sense to me. I dream of the future and never the good parts, always the bad. I know what people are going to say before they say it and I know what people are thinking. I just fear all the time and I hate it. I'm like afraid of fear itself. I pray for comfort, but the fear just comes back. Please, can someone tell me how to stop fearing so much or why I only feel fear? Is there something that is going to happen to me and is that why I am scared? I know when people are about to turn the corner and I know when things will happen but I don't know why I fear.
~River ❤