Things have gotten better, but I will never forget that one night, on September 17, 2015, when I started my grade 12 year.
This happened about a year and half ago when I was 17 (I'm 19 now) but still haunts and scares me like it happened yesterday. I have no way to describe this story other than an attempted possession. (Apologies, this is a long one).
One night when I went to bed I felt a strange feeling in my bedroom. Now, note I have always felt it and other things. When everyone's asleep and everything's off, I have heard conversations in the background that sound like the TV is still on. I have heard my name being called, I've heard whispers in my ear of words I can't make out. I have felt the air being sucked out of my lungs and quickly lunging awake because I can't breathe. I have felt weight on me, I have felt what felt like hands brushing over my body, and a tight grip around my ankle... All while alone in my bed at night.
But nothing compares to this:
It was the middle of the night and it took a while but I fell asleep. I woke up when I heard a noise and starred at the only light I had in my room, my alarm clock. It was around 3am and my eyes were heavy. I glanced over at my mirror when I saw a tall dark shadow fly across the room and vanish. At first I told myself it was late and I was tired, so I shook it off thinking I was still half asleep and seeing things. It wasn't until seconds later that I felt a chilling sensation down my spine and opened my eyes. I have never regretted it more.
It was blurry and dark, but for a faster than a second I saw that shadow again, lunging directly towards my face. I had no time to react or do anything but lie there. I was lying curled up on my side and then out of nowhere I was flown onto my back and my arms and legs went pin straight until I was lying in my bed flat. I have never known anyone to move that quickly, in fact I have no memory of being moved. Just suddenly it was like I was pushed by a truck.
There was a strong buzz that soared all throughout my body. The best I could describe this feeling is an unwanted adrenaline, but wasn't. My body became cold and I felt an unknown force inside me. I could feel my blood begin to rush and boil under my skin, and discomfort and fear as I struggled to breathe but my lungs wouldn't work. I became very scared and tried to open my eyes and wake up but I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe, open my eyes, move my fingers, lips or limbs. I tried to move anything I could, but my body did nothing but violently shake. I had no control, and then I heard a faint voice speaking words I couldn't make out, like it was whispering directly to my brain.
Keep in mind this all happened in 3 seconds of time.
My first thought was this shadow is inside me, and all I could think was fight. I didn't have time it think of what I was saying or why I was saying it. My mind still worked and all I could think was "Fight this. This is my body." I said this over and over and over again and didn't stop thinking it throughout the whole time.
Throughout it all I felt awake. I knew I wasn't dreaming, I know when I'm in a dream and can pull myself out of one. There was a presence here and I knew it. The air was cold under my sheets where it was previously warm and cozy. Even though I couldn't breathe, I knew the air was think like fog.
As I tried and tried and kept thinking "fight" as I desperately tried to move my body, when my leg finally kicked out and I hit my bedpost. That kick hurt but it made me think what I was doing was working. As scared as I was I stayed strong and I kept thinking, "Fight this. Fight this now," like it was a basic instinct.
Out of nowhere the shaking stopped, the rush was gone and I sat up straight nearly screaming. I sat there gasping for air like I had been drowning, and didn't stop. When I held my hand over my chest my heart beat was still racing faster than it should have been. I remember looking at my hands moving each finger knowing I was in control again. I never appreciated my body more.
But what shocked me the most, is when I looked at my clock and saw roughly 15 minutes had past. If that was the case and I couldn't breathe, why am I not dead? I'm sorry but that didn't and still does not make sense. I can only hold my breathe for 2 minutes, how did that last for 15 when it felt like 1?
I immediately ran out of my room to the living room and where the air felt safer to breathe. I didn't want to, but fell asleep on the couch that night. A couple weeks later, this happened again though not near as bad, but it was the same force again. It's been a year and half, and I still here voices and a presence lurking over my body every other night or so, but the attempts have stopped, at least I hope anyways.
I know this sounds made up, or like a story I have put together, but it's not I promise. I'm a writer and have wrote a short story about this night, and have had people message me asking where I came up with an idea like that. I didn't come up with it, because it happened to me, and even though it's been a year and half I am still scared every night to go to bed or be in the house on my own. I've told only a few people about this night, and one of my friends said I should get checked for Sleep Paralysis. It was a good idea since I have all the symptoms, expect not being able to breathe.
I haven't told my parents or younger brother (who's 17 now) and have hinted towards them about spirits in the house. They all believe nothing is here and have heard or seen nothing, or at least so they say. If told them I've seen and heard things in the house but they're iffy on believing me, since according to them I saw my dead grandfather walking around our previous house when I was 2, but again I was 2 and now I'm a lying 19 year old in their eyes.
One more thing, my friend who claims he can see them told me there are 4 or 5 spirits in my house, which makes sense cause I have heard 4 or 5 different voices. I dare not repeat anything else he told me when he spent the night here, but it scares me.
Again, I'm sorry this is so long. But I want and feel the need to get some answers back.
I don't really have a specific question, other than. Was this an attempted and failed possession, a warning, an awakening? What happened to me that night?
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Many years ago I experienced what I also believed was a being that entered my body. I had many sleepless nights, like you, where I would hear voices outside my door and footsteps in the hall. I've spent time contemplating these events and this is what I now believe happened and maybe it can somehow help you. So, like you I am sensitive to energies around me that are unseen and they can be both good and not so good. Well this scared me and I think I was living in major fear mode all the time. I believe that since I was constantly afraid and expecting the worst or wondering if the worst is going to happen, brought energies around me that were bad.
I don't like getting into the specifics of what happened since it was the worst night of my life, but just so you know, I also felt like I was fighting a foreign body that was inside and thinking how could this happen. I actually never thought something like that could happen. I always thought something even scarier would present itself in front of me, but never in a million years did I think it could be inside my body.
After many hours of struggling and intense praying, it finally left. I was really weak for about a month after that. I just had no energy. It never came back and I think it was because I felt that it wouldn't and that I somehow tackled a really big fear.
Also, no one believed me, my husband or my mother. So I did feel weird about the whole thing and alone since there was no one I could go to that would understand or offer advice. Since then I realize that a couple things were going on. 1) I can connect with those that have passed and I now direct them to the white light and ask my Spirit guide and God for assistance to cross them over 2) I don't have fear about anything that is unseen. Obviously I would avoid a haunted place with a negative energy. So do what you have to do to feel safe in your bedroom. Have spiritual objects, play spiritual music, pray - do any and all of these things before you go to sleep. Why? Simply put, it raises your vibration which means you are less likely to feel fear and to be in a place of love. With love in your heart and mind, you will be able to help those souls cross over and the one's that used to scare you will be gone forever.