Fighting My Gift

I just had the most crazy experience. I was talking to this guy by texting and it was like all of a sudden I saw he could be my future husband and a lot of happiness was around the people. I have always known I was different in the "meta" sense but never thought i'd understand why. I thought that everybody in a way felt something missing. I'm truly able to know how someone else feels and sense whether they are good or bad. I can tell when someone's lying and as much as I want to ignore it, the bad feeling just won't go away. It's like there's something in my head that tells me what they're saying is not the truth. I may not know the actual truth but I know what they're saying isn't true. This is the bad side of it because as much as you want to like someone you can't because you know their true inner nature. I am scared right now because it's all true. This gift has saved me a couple of times and for that I'm thankful. It's so crazy because how do you explain to someone you just know something? I have never said aloud "I am psychic" bc I'm not sure if I am. If I develop these abilities that would be so crazy. I saw my first ghosts or spirits when I was little and that I now know for sure was a true ghost. I've always talked myself out of things because I'm a realist. But something happened tonight I can't ignore. It's like I was under magic or something. I saw into my future as I was looking at my phone texting my new friend and all of a sudden I realized I was falling in love with him, I saw so much happiness in our future, I felt this feeling of completeness I've been looking for my whole life. I felt whole. And then all of a sudden I felt like myself again. I'm sitting here thinking how did I not know this all along? I have always felt it but wouldn't listen. My Grandma died recently and she was like this I think. I don't know because how in the hell do you ask your parents or tell them about this?

I've had something evil try to get into my body when I was little and then it happened again a couple times after college. It was scary but something deep inside me said to say the Lord's prayer. So I did it and this spirit went away. When I sleep my body heat is so hot people around me can feel it and say things about it. I ignored this too. I've always thought it was because my metabolism is super high. I can be around some people and they totally drain me while other people leave me feeling like I like to feel. I have regular moods depending on what's going on in my life. But when things get negative it somehow rubs off on me and I want to sleep. I've always thought I was depressed maybe but now it makes sense. What I'm doing and who I'm around contribute to this because I wake up happy and go to bed happy. LOL. People are magnetically attracted to me. And I've always wondered why and it's because I'm different. Maybe they sense something in me? IDK. I have noticed animals always act so loving towards me and I'm like a baby charmer or something. I can handle the worst kids and with me they are little angels. LOL. I've started a lot of fires on accident. And electronics mess up around me. This has been so frustrating for me because all my electronics mess up and I've never understood how one girl can have so much bad luck. This is my secret and I've only told 2 people so far. I don't want anyone to know this unless I have to tell them. I'm very scared right now in a way but excited too. There's a lot of other things I'm forgetting but that's mainly what's going on that makes me different. I can truly sense what others are feeling and know who's got a darker side to them. I felt crazy earlier because this all seems surreal. AND AS I TYPE EVERYTHING LATELY IT TAKES ME FOREVER BC EITHER MY COMPUTER GETS VIRUSES THAT MAKE THE SPACE KEY GO ALL OVER THE PAGE OR THERE'S A VIRUS OR MAYBE IT JUST MIGHT BE SOMETHING INSIDE ME. OMG WHO KNOWS! Today has been exhausting, and a relief all at one time but I haven't been to sleep bc how in the hell do you sleep the night you become aware you really are gifted?