I've always experienced good vibes or bad vibes from people, places and things, for as long as I can remember. And my emotions have been all over the map, also for as long as I can remember. In fact I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder Type II (depression and mild mania) a few years ago and I started taking medication. My moods still fluctuate.
Lately though, things are happening that are completely freaking me out. On some level I am afraid that I am having some kind of break to even believe this is possible. How can this be possible? And yet the things that are happening can't really be proven so I feel like I'll never really know for sure if I can put any stock into my experiences.
One thing that has happened consistently in my life with people I am close to, is that my nose and face will itch insanely when someone is sending me an email, calling me, showing up on my door, thinking about me because they just received a message of some kind from me, etc.
Lately however, in addition to this itching, I've been getting an intense pain and tightness in my chest area when someone close to me is upset. I can't tell who it is or what it is about when it is happening, but I've experienced it in situations where the person is mad at me and also when the person is just mad in general. It has happened with my boyfriend, my best friend and my son.
Ok, now here is the really freaky part for me. I've been experiencing thoughts just popping into my head, that aren't mine! I'll be walking along, calm as can be, pass by someone and a thought will pop into my head, a thought that I had not previously considered. It happens at intersections when I am crossing and I will look at the driver I think it is coming from and he/she will be looking straight at me. It has happened with my boss. And it has happened with my boyfriend. I am going to dedicate the next paragraph to him because most of what has been happening is specific to him.
Firstly I met him online and once I saw his picture I could not pass it by. I kept being drawn back to it. Then the first time I saw his first and last name in print it nearly knocked me off my chair. I had a physical reaction to his name. It knocked the wind out of me. The chemistry between us is off the charts. We were talking one day on the phone and a thought popped into my head of what he was going to get me for my birthday, and a week later I received what I thought that day. And one night when we were hugging goodbye, and my mind was totally calm and blank, the following words popped into my head "I love this woman..." It was not wishful thinking unless my subconscious mind is playing major tricks on me. It was not my thought. Unbelievable.
I think I want someone to tell me that this is real and I can believe in it when it happens. But I also need to understand if it is real, then how is it possible, how does it happen and why doesn't it happen to everyone? My Mom says she gets vibes from places. Her emotions have always been all over the map too. Can this also be genetic?
Any/All comments welcome. Thanks for reading.
Warmly,
Ren