Comments for The Bad Man at Gradma's House: Page 1

GlendaSC I have for a while, I have had issues with depression and it was not because I was really 'selfish' in fact I have never expected anyone to make me happy. Not that I cannot make myself happy, I really really try and I do biofeeback and all of this other stuff, sometimes it's harder to do than say... Especially when you are talking to someone, who has never expierenced real longlasting depression before. It's not that I view the world in a negative way so much, ironically I can see it as a place for change and amazing things. Sometimes depression is not caused by non religion, being rich/poor or always being negative. I think that is just the sterotpyical view point. Sometimes we don't always know why we are depressed. I've always had a wonderful family and great friends. And opposite of your conclusion I've always been the one who loves to entertain other people, rather than be entertained. Sometimes you try to change your routine, better yourself and help others, but it doesn't always make you happy, even if you try. I know it sounds like well you must not be trying hard enough if you can't be happy! But I think if you've ever truely been through it, you might change some of your opinons and assertions about it, it's not always what it seems. It's having hope that is the difference.

Flutter - Perhaps I was a little too harsh. I heard once that depression was caused, a lot, when people felt they had no choices, whether from their own past choices or whatever. I've never had it, hard times but not depression and mostly good stuff probably, but that made sense to me. So, I guess we need to change things sometimes. If depressed, make a change in some way. Change the routine. Take a new hobby. Accept who we are and why we are unique with all our faults. See if it helps.

I think some people EXPECT to be happy all the time. I think of them as Sesame Street people. Entertain me. To me, happiness is accomplishing something or understanding something. I don't need entertainment. I accept that my life isn't perfect, but I make choices and unexpected things happen. To me, depression seems a little selfish. I know that it can be physical in some cases, hormones and all, and we all have that stuff. But, some of it seems like people have chosen to focus on themselves and not on those around them.

I wish someone would tell some of my family members that depression doesn't last forever, LOL! They make it a lifestyle! 😆 I believe that we are responsible for our own happiness, and the reason why many (not all) people are unhappy, is because they think someone else is responsible for their happiness. I don't know what is going on with these kids, but I remember after I gave birth to my first child, I became horrified. I was upset that I had brought a child into this crazy world and would have to turn her loose into it one day. I got past that, eventually. But I still have those twinges were I wonder what kind of world will be out there waiting for them when they leave home. I pray over them everyday. It's the only thing I can do, and it makes me feel better.

I am 49. My grandparents and church had an outhouse and pump water. In my 24th year or so, not sure exactly, I had a PC plopped on my desk and was told to figure it out and teach it. To format a disk you had DOS *.* stuff. My new boss at my new job told me that the old old system was doss and she hoped it wouldn't be too much of a pain. I clicked on icons. DOS did not have them. I kept my mouth shut because it is an old system though, just not that old. It isn't harder than anything else, but time is moving faster. That is historical. Use to, major shifts happened in thousands of years. Now they happened in two decades or less. I do not know what that means. I've heard profs lecture on this and I have seen it. I know this much change, this fast, must be hard. Sorry.

Martin is only here for the brawls :P

I am in no way saying that things have not changed. For change is inveitable. Without change one becomes accustomed to patterns that bore the mind causing idleness, confusion, depression and anger. That's why I think it is important for a person to always try/do/see things in a new light.

Kids today have a different way expressing themselves true, at least in this society, which can be very rude. But you must also remember that over 300 words in the english languages change per minute. Ha-ha

If a word can change that fast, hopefully the redirection of negativity in today's society can as well

It is shown that today's society more than ever depression is becoming more and more common amoung teens around the world, in this past generation it is the highest that it has ever been.

Depression usually sparks from 'phobias' fear of habit (sub/conciously) by Pavlov's defintion 'learned conditioning'. Is it that we are afraid more than ever today or are we getting ready to protect ourselves from something?

All I know is that you can't stay depressed forever (well some can) but as a whole, so that goodness for change right?

Whether one generation had it "harder" than another is debateable... On both sides. But no one can argue that things are different. Before, the policy was that what happened at home between family members was personal and private. Now, the government, state and federal alike, want to know everything that is going on. That was a good thing when it came to kids that were actually being abused, because it shed light on something that had been hidden for so long. But on the flip side, they want to direct people on how to raise their children, which I believe is wrong. "Don't spank little Johnny or speak harshly to him..." Blah, blah, blah. And how's that working out for them? Not good. I have first hand experience with how disrespectful so many kids are, that I am startled when I come across one with respect for elders. I have four kids ranging in age from middle school down to kindergarten. I watch how these parents interact with their kids, or how they let their kids treat them. It's astonishing! And not in a good way! A few years ago my daughter was attacked on the bus by a boy. And you know what the principal said when I went into his office? "Boys will be boys..." I was livid! He was totally blase about the whole thing (as was the boy's mother). I ended up going to the superintendent of the school system and writing a letter to my congresswoman. I don't know what they said to the principal, but he apologized not only verbally, but in writing. He left the school the following year. BTW, that boy got kicked off my daughter's school bus too. 😆

Oh I smell a generational battle stirring up 😉 It reminds me of an old greek philosopher living some 2000-2500 years ago complaining that the current younger generation was lazy and spoiled and had it easy compared to his 😆

Okay, I agree with you on the whole parent issue abuse thing with sewing and all of this ridiculious stuff when it doesn't need to be. But playing the whole 'my generation' had it harder than your generation card, no offense, is petty. All of us could pretend to play that saying well I had to walk 30 miles in the snow, or I had to hunt for my food, what now there is e-mail! Haha... But you're born when you're born so can't change that, but change the times itself

Yes there is a big gap there, many parents are placed in jail for child abuse, they usually have not done. And the ones that have abused there children are out, doing it over and over. This world is just getting worse and worse I think. Thanks for your reply.

Flutter - It almost seems like kids are protected too much, like calling in their parents if they get paddled, and others aren't protected nearly enough or at all. It's a big gap. I've heard horrible stories on the news, especially lately, of unstable people with their children. I once threatened to spank my child. She threatened me with calling me in. I had her get in the car and I drove her to the place foster care kids have to live. I told her, if she called me in, ever, I would make sure to donate clothes there because that would be her new home. I'm reasonable, a marshmellow even, and that particular threat never happened again.

[at] GlendaSC thanks for your kind remarks to my story. Years ago lots of people got away with far to much. Now days try that kind of stuff, and see what happens to them. Heck now days all one has to do is slap a child, and they have child abuse charges on them. My kids see out houses at rest areas, and I tell them that is what we had, all the time. They just can't believe that either.
Once again thanks for your kind remarks.

Flutter - I know that some will wonder why Grandma didn't call the police right away. Well, where I am from, that just wasn't done often. It's all different now. Back then, it was as scary for the victim. People were a little afraid of the law maybe. I can understand that. My grandfather was a farmer, shoe shop owner, constable (much like the police now) and a tough person in many, many ways. And there were few rules.

Anyway, I am sorry this happened. Very. Our generation, more than most, went through some major stuff, like changes. I can remember the outhouse at church and drawing water. I also remember getting the first personal computer in my office to figure out. My kids cannot comprehend that much change. Talk about a generation gap. But mostly it's technical. Our generation manages to catch up with that because we've had to do it.

I don't believe in accidents. Things happen and become who we are, good and bad.

Hi Hollinor that is right. Now days they be taken to court and put in prison for stuff like that. I guess at least my Grandma got rid of him out of her house, making my sister and I feel safer there.
Thanks for your comment to this story.

So he just went on his merry way to assault other innocent children. How horrible for you! I'm not speaking negative against you Flutter. The mindset of the 1950's is different than it is now. It's so sad that this person could not be prosecuted for his crimes. No telling how many other children have had their lives damaged due to this degenerate.