I had no thought or belief in psychic abilities until a few days ago. My mind wasn't even near the subject of spirituality at all.
I was reading online about how to chance your subconscious beliefs so you could succeed in your goals, specifically for me in track and field. I was having confidence issues that were effecting my race results. So I went on YouTube and found a video on hypnosis for self confidence. I did this 10 minute video twice a day for two days, and I believe it worked. But I wanted a better one. So I found one on a website. I became a member and watched a 23 minute video on hypnosis for self confidence with brainwave entrainment. This worked very very well. So well, in fact, I began to feel dizzy during the hypnosis. I felt like my head was staying still and my body was swirling around my head. Later that night, I felt my entire lower body vibrating, for most of e evening and as I was falling asleep. I felt my forehead tingling and this pressure in the center of my forehead. I googled it and read about the third eye. So I was more curious. I kind of forgot some of the story here. By somehow I ended up reading a lot about psychic ability and clairvoyance and spirit guides and all that stuff.
Throughout the whole day I felt like I was still in alpha state. Additionally I kept getting flashes of knowledge. I guess that's a good way to describe it. I knew things, automatically. I was looking through my biology textbook and I needed to know the page number of a section about muscle fibers, and the number 954 popped into my head, and that's the page the information I needed was on. I know what people were going to say before they said it, like in my mom's phone conversations, I could predict ahead of time when she would speak again and the first word she would say.
I know Things physically too, like where something was in Walmart today. My mom asked me because she couldn't find something. And something in me just mentally pointed to it, kind of like a magnet drawing me to it. Not physically, but just making me aware that it was there. And there it was. I was right. I did that a few more times for things I needed. Also I got separated from her once, and I pictured the store in my head and I could feel her energy in a certain part of the store, and she was there.
But most importantly to me, the biggest thing, I see faces. I think this began after the night my head started tingling. If my forehead tingles and I am not visually focused on a specific object, I will see a face. Not real faces like hallucinations, more like the energetic imprint of a face. Kind of like how you stare at the sun and it leaves an impression on your vision. I see four different faces. They're kind of green-colored.
I was attempting to talk to them today because I think they are my spirit guides. And I was just generally curious. So I meditated with an alpha wave video. The top of my head began to tingle in addition to my forehead. And I did see the faces, and I asked questions, and the answers just popped right into my head. It was all comforting, made me feel better. They told me my life purpose. I think. And I remember at one point, I mentally said something to the face I see most frequently, I think his name is Steve? (Are they supposed to have human names?) I said something like, "why do you look like a skull and no one else does? It's kind of scaring me. Do something to show me you're not scary." And a feeling equivalent of a shrug popped into my head. And I saw his 'face' float toward me and expand like a balloon. And it entered me. And I felt like... Good. Really good, comforted, not scared at all, it was a good feeling. And then once I was mentally convinced, I saw it leave and reform into a face shape.
And I told them, that whenever they are near me or wanted to contact me to give me a sign. And my vision started wavering, I saw so many colors of energy everywhere, (kind of like when you get up too fast) and my ears started ringing. And I knew that's what they would do when they were near me.
And in ADDITION to all of that spirit guide stuff happening within the last few hours, I see waves. Kind of like how the heat rises off of the pavement in the summer. Transparent, but wavering. And I sometimes see green "rings" around it. But these don't have faces. Or at least I can't see them. It's just like, transparent energy. And I only see this sometimes, in certain places. Seemingly random places. I don't think they're there for me, I think they're just there. But I'm not sure.
I am so overwhelmed I just want it all to stop for now but my forehead won't stop tingling. The top of my head too, when I think about it. I feel like I'm not normal anymore. I feel like... I'm making it all up and I'm insane. I don't know why I am posting this.
Also further evidence of my quick-onset insanity is the fact that I read that it takes years to develop these kinds of abilities. I'm only 17, 18 in two days. And I read that even then, naturally clairvoyant people rarely see visual faces, and that clairvoyant people usually see things in their minds eye. Not their physical eyes. I see them in both. Closed eyes or opened or in my visual imagination, doesn't matter, they're still there. I think I am equally or secondarily claircognizant.
I mean part of me thinks its cool and I do believe in it, especially after that one entered me, but its all happening way too fast and I can't shut it off. I don't really know the point of this. I just could use some advice, on how to deal with all of this, I don't even know.
I'm so mentally scattered all over the place right now. I guess I'm looking for opinions, you could just tell me if I'm schizophrenic. Or if I'm just making it up, because I'm crazy. Advice would be nice. I don't know. I need to rest.
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