The past six months, I have come to the realization that sometimes, when I feel people project their feelings strongly on me, I can take over their feelings, and I feel exactly what they feel. Sometimes I can even feel what they want to do next. It's not something I'm able to explain in words really.
I didn't used to be this strong, I've been reasonably depressed the past 2 years and sometimes I do XTC with my friends and I think this triggered it. My parents are deaf, since I was a baby I learned how to communicate through body language and reading lips. Body language always told me much about a person. I never really felt at home in the 'hearing world' nor did I feel at home in the 'deaf world', basically as if I'm limbo. I'm a very introverted person.
Why I came to this realization 6 months ago is because something that happened at a festival. A friend of mine started calling me names and treating me badly for no reason. She was in a relationship at the time and I felt like she was doing it because she was jealous (I was hanging with her ex, because she ditched me there). I couldn't stand it anymore and I forced myself to cry, so she would understand that I would never like or do something with her ex. 3 other people and her current boyfriend were sitting next to me when that happened. They all thought it was very weird and she told me she absolutely had no feelings for him. Since the festival I don't speak to her much anymore, but 3 months ago, she broke up with her boyfriend and got back with her ex. When I was at another festival, I asked her, "How are things going with your boyfriend?" and she told me "We broke up, because I still have feelings for my ex". Later on that night, I also felt that she was extremely jealous of me, in a bad way. Now I'm afraid that if I become friends with her again, her jealousy will get in the way someday.
2 weeks ago, I met this guy who told me he never met someone like me and that I was 'special'. He told me he could feel my aura and that I had the most beautiful aura he'd ever seen. He said he could recognize me in a crowd of 1000 easily. He told me it mainly was light blue. He also said he has the same thing as me, that he could sense other people's feelings and is able to tell who is a good or bad person. It was pretty interesting, because we spent an entire night reading and guessing each others feelings. I was almost always right about him and he almost always about me. He told me he was falling for me from the beginning, and I told him it wasn't mutual. However, I could feel his feelings for me so strongly, it freaked me out a little. I never feel depressed around other people, but when I'm by myself I just feel empty.
When I see kids walking on the street (2-5) they always stare at me for a long time and smile. I've always wondered if they do that because they can see my aura. I used to babysit on this girl and she decided to 'draw' me when I was 16 (I'm 20 now). She drew 3 hearts: the first one was a bright shade of pink, the second one was yellow/gold-esque and the third one was black.
My mom always told me she is 'paranormal'. When I talk about people, mention their names, she sometimes can 'see' that person or how they are feeling. When my grandpa died, she had a dream in which he came to tell her that everything is going to be alright. She also had this dream about a train station and the last stop being the number 70. She told me that she felt that meant she was going to die before that age.
I'm just wondering if I actually have 'psychic' abilities or that I'm just going full paranoid. I hope someone on here is willing to read my long story and to tell me what's going on. (:
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