I Am Pretty Sure I Am An Empath

I am in my 50's and was just let to the book, "Empowered by Empathy,"~Rose Rosetree. In just a few sentences I feel as if a huge weight has been lifted from my very soul. Reading things like, 'you are different from the crowd and always will be... And finding out that all the fears, and depressions that seem to come out of no where are from other people, etc." Of course, I am in for reading many books and searching for answers but I am feeling better knowing that these things aren't necessarily premonitions but actually feeling what is going on. An example, yesterday I kept fighting the mental vision of a fire. I was upset and afraid. I finally gave it to the universe, Goddess, God (whatever you believe) and it went away. This morning in the local news there was a fire in town and the vehicles were being averted to different areas. Now I am finding more and more people just like myself and it does help.
Good Luck.
Lin

I don't know anything enough to post something big as other's post. I am just a simple young empath just like you. When I read your post my heart suddenly beat hard, and I felt very tired or sad. I'm sorry if I cannot give you some tips in how to cope with this, but please if you feel this things again, remember us. We are here with you, to give support in silence. We love you and I know it's hard but this is the only thing I could do for you. I send you my love. I hope you smile again for the bright new days.:)

New Sophia,
I am learning new things everyday. I was ready to give up this profession at one point because I felt it drained me so much that it makes me physically ill. On top of seeing clients the place I work is very disorganized and there are a lot of angry, burnt out people there. I hate going into the building for our meetings there. Anyway, I definitely get the emotions strongly, I get a lot of headaches and stomach issues (always have). I went to Salem Mass one time because I was very into the witch trials, had done a paper on it, etc. Was very enthused to go. The day started out normal but as I went to each historical building, the first being the actual church the trials went on in, I started to get some overwhelming feelings of depression, despair, hopelessness. It was so intense I told my husband I couldn't do anymore of the sites and tried to get the feelings to go away by just going into the gift shops. I wanted to RUN from that city it was so bad. It stayed with me to a lesser degree the rest of the day and we stayed in an old hotel overnight. I wanted to leave but couldn't bring myself to ruin my husband's time as well. I was at a loss as to what to tell people after that when they asked how I liked going there. I told the truth about it and got some pretty strange looks from my sister-in-law who had watched my children so we could go. I could not explain it adequately even to myself, I was confused as to why it happened but now am pretty sure I know. I am glad I found this site to share because I have always been told I have a vivid imagination and of course believed it myself that it was mental. At this point what I would like most of all is to use it to other's and my benefit. I feel like it has controlled me and not the other way around so everything people say here so far has been helpful and validating. I started meditating again and will continue to start my day with a visualization of white light surrounding me and protecting me from the onslaught of emotions I get from the individual's and families I see. This includes my own family who have also done this to me without me or them realizing it. I thought I just loved people too much and wanted to "fix" them. Now I want to help them help themselves because like me they have lessons in this lifetime to learn. I also know what you mean by being careful with whom I see but I don't have that luxury in my current position because it is community based. I get some pretty ugly and scary feelings from people as well. Thanks for sharing and listening.

Hi Jean: Admittedly, I have not read 100% of the responses to your original post... Will do that later. Wanted to ask are you an NF on Myer's Briggs? I suspect so. Most therapists are. Further, have you read any of Elaine Arons work on The Highly Sensitive Person? I share your vocation & am highly intuitive and often know the emotional/mental state my patient is in before anything is said. It's a gift & I make that fact my frame of reference. I too Bubble-up, which is a shielding technique whereby I place a semi-permeable bubble around me that is see through. I've don't it for so many years - it's natural. Use it to deflect, or filter out things you don't want. Also, debrief with another professional often & "fill up" with high energy often. I do this through beautiful music, brightly colored, high energy raw fruits & veggies, meditation & hot showers that I use energy visualization techniques in. I love be an HP now, because we are truly rare & further, we're involved in our mission work. That being said - become VERY selective whom you take in your practice! Good luck!

Thank you most sincerely. I think that is exactly what I will do. Watch it unfold and know that it is what it is supposed to be. I have already been trying to keep my self shielded when visiting clients and I found that I can still get it even when shielded but that it does not feel so intense. I have been visualizing the white light of divine power and love flowing through me and keeping me shielded. I have found that I learn as much from the people I see as they learn from me and I think that is what I am supposed to do. I am going to also commit myself back to my meditation as I was doing that consistently before and haven't in a couple of months now. I want to thank you for sharing your story with me as well. I was not beaten but was the victim of molestation from the time I was four until I was a teen and literally stood up to the victimizer and said "no more". I have evolved as you have said and am grateful for every lesson learned and also believe we pick our parents before we are born. Again thank you this has been a great support for me right now.

We should go easy on ourselves. I'm in your age group and we did not have the good fortune of sites like this (or even the web itself) when growing up. We were left utterly alone with very little resources to figure out what was going on. Society is still largely cut off to anything paranormal or metaphysical (and even truly spiritual). I work at a big corporation and one of the men in my group found one of my web sites and couldn't wait to rush around the office telling everyone what a 'nut job' I was. Closed mindedness is still rampant.

So, like me, you grew up utterly ignorant and afraid. Is it any wonder it's still frightening and confusing? Who was there to guide you? All we had, which in the end is all we need, is our higher selves. It just takes time. Yes, trauma plays a part to our development. It's the soul who wants to accomplish the very most in this lifetime that lines themselves up with the hardest of times. I just heard on the radio a great story the other day. A now famous soccer player here in our Seattle area was fascinated by great minds and people who had made a huge impact on society (he wanted to be one of them). When asked, in summary, what the common thread was of these great minds (like Lincoln, Dr. Martin Luther King and so on) was that each had to endure hardship, sometimes extreme.

Why do my words resonate with you? Because I had an easy childhood and all this knowledge just luckily downloaded into my brain? No, it's because I've been through the so called worst. My mother beat me (broke my nose at age two because I walked in front of the tv), put me in an orphanage, tried to kill my sister and I, my father abused and then abandoned us, I had to deal with poltergeists, spontaneous astral projections, and on and on and on. But I picked these parents and life before I was born here! I had to endure every abuse and make every mistake following that so that I could move past that into a place of love and wisdom. These traits are not free!

As to what to do next, sometimes just a good old fashion "release" is the key. Release yourself to the moment/universe and let life happen for a little bit. Take a break from the stress of trying to figure it all out. If you've noticed, you've evolved quite a bit and usually during the hard times. You are still evolving. Love yourself for this wonderful achievement and for your bravery. You're not alone! The negativity will eventually pass. In its place will be acceptance, surrender and peace.

Anne

I want to say thanks for the input, it has been helpful. I am wondering what my next step should be in finding out more about myself from others who know more about it than I do. Is it unusual, once you have accepted that these things are real, for all of the unusual experiences one has had come rushing back into your memory? It has been this way for a couple of days, random memories coming back of many of the experiences I had. I remember when I was about fourteen my father was thinking about being stationed in England and I cried, was terrified, and told them I didn't want to go because there were too many ghosts there. We lived in England when I was four through six and I remember I hated it and was constantly scared there. This was also the first place I started to "see things" at night which were very real to me but were called hypnagogic hallucinations by others. I would also hear them talking but I could never make out what they were saying (not that I tried to because I was so scared). I remember most of my childhood into my teens being terrified of the dark and nighttime because of this. My parents of course ridiculed this and forced me to sleep with the light off which I would always turn back on when I thought they were asleep again. I would always go stand by my mother's bed but not wake her up (because I knew I would get in trouble) just so I wouldn't be alone. This used to freak her out because she would wake up with me just standing there silently. I had nightmares on a regular basis and of things that I was never exposed to because they wouldn't let me watch anything scary because of how I was. So it wasn't like I saw gross or scary stuff but that was what was in my dreams. So whatever those of you can tell me that will help me to "handle" these abilities without being negatively influenced by them, I would greatly appreciate. Thanks so much for listening.

I just want to say I've enjoyed reading your discussion ladies. I also appreciate Jeanrosel your posting your story on this website. I know many professionals within psychology, and many other fields, who immediately discount these sort of experiences as being psychic. I am an English teacher who is going back to school to get my Masters in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. After years of having empathic and precognitive and other psychic experiences, I finally figured out that where my skills are most useful is in counseling.

Ann,
The more you share the more it resonates with me. You are right, I cannot just walk away, never have been able to. I would even have stray animals come to me. People's animals in their homes (I do home visits) are immediately attracted to me as are a lot of children and teenagers. I once, like you, cried about a story on the news about a little boy who was raped and beaten, then left for dead on a riverbank. I could not get it out of my head, it stayed with me for days.
I have also gotten glimpses of the bigger picture and that all of this does have reason but the pain of it seems so overwhelming I have a hard time with what good will come of this being part of the plan? I don't know if trauma plays a part in this but a lot of these things intensified tremendously a few years back after illness, surgery, and a rough recovery occurred for me. I felt profoundly changed but unable to figure out what I was supposed to do about it. My spirituality grew by leaps and bounds and I was reading a lot of literature that made perfect sense to me about the interconnectedness of all beings. I also know that the balance has already tipped and that scares me as well. When I was 12 I thought that we were literally killing the earth and became very scared and anxious. My parents thought I was ridiculously overly sensitive and I felt ashamed and out of place, like I didn't belong with them. None of my friends seemed to worry about the things I worried about on top of the normal growing up stuff.
On the positive side I have been meditating for a few years although I have lapsed in the last several months. I noticed a big difference from this practice. I am also food sensitive and this affects my moods. I require more alone time than others and sometimes want to shut the world out totally and get very irritable. Thank you again, this has been informative and validating.
Jeanrosel

I don't know if this will be of any further consolation to you, but when you die, you will go through a life review of all that you have done for those around you, for better or for worse and in great detail. How you've sacrificed, gave of your own energy, stuck with something you loved though it was so very hard on you. None of this is overlooked and your joy will be tremendous and the place you end up will be indescribable in its beauty and all encompassing love. Did Mother Theresa not suffer cruelly at all that she saw on this plane of existence? Should she have turned away from the suffering to make herself feel better? For her, that wasn't an option and it sounds like it's not for you either but you can still take steps to ease that, and you're well on your way.

I wept bitterly after the gulf oil spill. It was all I could do to remind myself that this too was part of the plan for the here and now. For all my decades on this earth, I'm still learning that I only see a small part of the cosmic picture. Time and time again I judge "bad" things but the link to my higher self has widened and I keep being shown that I shouldn't judge, because I'm not consciously privy to the "Plan". I'd be shown glimpses here and there to keep me in check and when I forgot, I'd be shown again. There were times with great indignation I'd declare that: "No way in THIS situation can there be any good! (like I finally stumped the All That Is.) " And to my shock, I'd be sent visions of how it really came to be and it was perfect. I just eventually gave up trying to judge something so profound.

What is it you and I and others see right now in this world? We see a world going to pot. Forget the tipping point that people keep warning us we're heading for, it's already tipped and fallen over on its face. So here is our choice. Do we get sucked into the smaller negative picture (which in my opinion is part of one plan if we don't get the real message) or do we see the bigger plan and stay loving and neutral and trust that there is something a whole heck of a lot smarter than us running this grand show? This event that is rolling out right now is going to happen whether we're balling our eyes out over it or watching with deep reflection and wisdom. I do not promote any religion on this site, but I do wonder how Buddha or Christ would handle this. My guess is the latter.

I hope you have a good day. I'll be thinking of you.
Anne

Thank you so much. This does help. I have often in the past told people how drained of energy I felt at the end of the day. I wan't to isolate, not talk on the phone, not engage in any activities and I feel like I am not really living. I have even had some of my clients tell me OMG you're psychic cause I am so dead on the money with what I get from them. I will get that book that you mentioned because I don't want to dread going to my job everyday and feeling like there is nothing left for me at the end of the day and nothing left for my husband either.
I also get what you say about people being where they need to be. I wonder what then I should be doing with them and with all the emotional energy that surrounds me when I am with them? I have gotten to the point where I think that my job is going to literally be the death of me and yet I love doing therapy so it gets very confusing as to why I want to just run away sometimes. I notice sometimes also that if they are angry I get angry for them and it sometimes feels like "why am I so angry?" Another client would just walk in and it was like she carried this cloud of depression and doom in with her. I always knew her mood before she ever even opened her mouth and it was oppressive to say the least. And then it is hard to get rid of.
This happens a lot when I watch the news and that is why I don't watch it very often but when I visit my in-laws they have it on constantly. I get very emotionally whacked out and start to feel overwhelmed like I am drowning in it. Always thought I was too sensitive and couldn't let go of things easily. I feel like I need to learn more about this so I I have some kind of control.
You are right when you say that I am a natural at what I do, this has been put in almost every recommendation letter I have ever received from my supervisors and have often had some of them say that I needed to trust myself more and trust those "gut" feelings because they are more often right than not. I ALWAYS have second guessed myself because I was so afraid of being wrong or hurting someone emotionally any more than they are already hurting.
Okay I will shut up now but this is really good to get off my chest without feeling like I am unstable and can't "handle" things. I want the tools to help me manage this no matter the source or the interpretation of it. I very seldom think this ability is a "good" thing and I wonder if I can ever perceive it and use it as a "good" thing. Thanks so much for listening.
Jeanrosel

Greetings,

It's rare that a person would go into psychology and not be sensitive in the first place. Your empathy is probably what makes you a good therapist. It's also not surprising this can drain you. Whether we see it or not, the energy bodies of those around us can leech into ours and you're specifically working with people who "need help" and since you're the only one in the room at the time with them, your energy source is often their spiritual food.

Any professional in a caretaker environment (nurse, therapist, even people who might work in mental institutes or prisons) have to take special care of their own health and well being. Since you're a natural empath and psychically sensitive you've got to deepen your boundaries between you and others, "close" your energy bodies down to some degree while working with particularly draining clients. Don't take on their negative energies but let them pass through. I've also stressed over and over to empaths that you have to have your own ample down-time, stress reducers, exercise, and the right food intake. We need more quiet time than the average person. An example of my evening after work and a draining one hour commute in Seattle traffic, includes walking my dog (good exercise and a lovely walk in the woods with my beloved pet). Then I might work on a puzzle for awhile, light candles and take a hot bath. Start a fire and read a book. And probably the most important thing you can do is get lots of sleep. When we sleep, our chakras open and our energy gets replenished. Lack of sleep is a quick path to illness on many levels. Make time for you. Without your health, both mental and physical, you won't be able to help others.

One last thing. I know you want to save the world, and goodness knows, this world needs help, but we also have to learn to trust that people are where they need to be and not partake in their self created dramas. Even though we don't consciously realize it, we create our reality, whatever that reality is - individually and collectively. We aren't really saving anyone. They save themselves through this thing called life and even if we stopped counseling today, their higher self would find the next perfect opportunity or person to take them to the next level.

An empath who doesn't find the news depressing isn't an empath. But again, we have all collectively created this reality by very small degrees that have added up to a whopper. But this is spiritual first grade and serves a purpose we can barely fathom. Everything we see is first grade behavior and when you evolve beyond this, you will stop coming here unless it's for a higher purpose such as to teach, lead in a true spiritual way, or heal. Let's not rob the first graders of this grade. We too needed it at that time in our own evolution.

If you're interested in a very well written book on how our energy bodies work, and how people in the health industry cope and develop with issues similar to yours, I cannot recommend enough a book by Dr. Barbara Brennan called Hands of Healing Light. It's a must for any health professional that has to deal with subtle energies.

I hope this helps.
Anne
Eclecticraven -at- yahoo (dot) com