I had an awful nightmare last night. I was walking along the copper leaf-strewn path- where the path was I didn't know- and I saw a small child on the ground, no more than five. He had a mid-sized pumpkin on his lap, and was staring at it intently until I clumsily stepped on and broke a twig. His head snapped up and he looked at me with curious brown eyes.
He was a beautiful child with pale skin, rosy cheeks, sparkling brown eyes and thick, soft black curls on his head. He grinned at me and I couldn't help but notice all of his teeth were unusually sharp as I smiled back at him. Out of nowhere, his head snapped down and he took a vicious bite of the raw pumpkin. I scolded him slightly and told him that he didn't know where that came from and shouldn't eat it.
I already felt an irrational need to protect this child.
I looked over to the side and saw that the pumpkin was turning to ash where his hands and mouth had been touching it, and turned to the child just in time for him to vomit up a fountain of black-crimson blood and evaporate into thin air. My mother just had to get a hysterectomy- is this just a result of that or something else?
This has plagued my dreams and daymares for the past weak, so I finally broke down and submitted this.
Also... I've been seeing disturbing things all day and night long. Just flashes... But they are of terrible, terrible things. Pain, death, war, cold, rage, helplessness, despair... And most of all, the sort of choking fear that paralyzes you.
I constantly run to the bathroom from my bed in the wee hours of the morning, shaking, crying, sweating and trying desperately NOT to throw up. I have been having... Awful panic attacks. Fear of death. It starts off with just an offhand thought about how long I'll live, and it doesn't stop until I'm shaking so badly I can barely move and am just on the edge of breaking into hysterical sobs.
This ISN'T what I normally feel like. I used to have panic attacks a lot, yes. About once a month, give or take. Now I have them once a NIGHT, if I'm LUCKY. I'm not considering suicide, but I am curious as to whether anyone went through this and knows what it's all about.
I draw people... People that I've never seen before, people that I didn't invent. Am I seeing the past or the future or both?
On a lighter note, I have recently found out that I can make the wind change directions or blow bu singing and saying what I want in my mind. I spent an hour and a half in my front yard singing and giggling like mad. One guy walked past when I had a pause in my song and was just staring at the tree and laughing... I got a REALLY weird look for that one.
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