Confused Empath

Hi, Adele.

I'm glad you wrote your piece here. Your precognition regarding cancer, your connection with animals and people, and your intuitive, if not visual, awareness of auras are also very familiar experiences for me, as I believe they are for many empaths, particularly those whose gifts have developed in the area of healing.

The "uncontrollable weakness' that you describe, that of taking on the experience of others, is a fairly universal challenge to empaths, and I have certainly had to deal with it myself. It can range from pervasive mood through moral and spiritual orientation and even through physical health or illness. It is, in itself, neither good nor evil, but it is critical to find a "controlling strength" so that you do not become washed away or sucked down in the experiences of those around you. There are two aspects to this, one having to do with maintaining your own field, the other with choosing how you populate it.

First, there is the matter of internal center and shielding. Part of your gift is the ability to commune with the experience of others, which can support you in whatever your walk is, and totally shutting it out would ultimately rob you of health and fulfillment. On the other hand, allowing negative energies to overwhelm your own field (or allowing others to drain your positive reservoirs) can be deadly. For some of us, simply being in a highly populated area can be overwhelming for reasons that less sensitive individuals have a difficult time comprehending. I find your comment about preferring to be by yourself very understandable.

I have found that, if my center is strong, I do not have difficulty maintaining my own field. A mental picture might be a sort of bubble around one's self, over which one has sovereignty. If that bubble develops a thick, brittle shell, the individual becomes isolated and ultimately unhealthy. On the other hand, if there is no "membrane" the individual is at the mercy of every passing current. What is critical is that you establish your own thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and direction. Finding that center and those rhythms is an individual and ongoing pilgrimage, but make sure to focus on (here's the second aspect: how you populate it): the realm of light, characterized by love (not guilt, dependency, lack of self-entitlement, or any of the games that go with the word... But love), truth (not dogma, rules, judgment of others, or accepted norms, but truth), healing (not fear of death, illness, or suffering, but healing), and faithful orientation to the ultimate (not surrendering your brain, passion, and organs of fortitude away to some liturgical spay/neuter clinic, but real faith in Spirit). The ideas, symbols, rituals, and the like that you find to keep these personal rhythms will become your source of health, balance, and power. It may be the church, it may be an earth-based religion, it may be the Tao... But whatever it is that your spirit resonates with... Practice it - strengthen it. It will balance you, it will keep you safe, and it will empower you. Ultimately, what you need in your field is you... And your instincts to spend time alone are, indeed, critical to building, evolving, and maintaining that identity. Walk, sail, write, meditate, paint... Whatever you can. Don't ever apologize to anyone, including yourself, for that portion of your time which must be there for you.

I said that your empathy is part of your gift. Whatever your deepest passions are, you will find that your gifts are her bedfellows. Your genuine spiritual ability to experience within yourselves the essence of others will support your art, your healing, your teaching... Whatever it is that is on your path. For me, it meant that I could bring comfort to POW's by embodying their stories on stage, build productive alliance with suicidal drug addicts on the streets, and create collaboration between alienated parties in a variety of charged settings ranging from violence to child welfare. On the other hand, some of my coworkers had a hard time with the ease that I had with prostitutes and gang members, and most of my friends have not been able to wrap their heads and hearts around the breadth of my own range of emotional identification. As I said, several of the things that you mention are consistent with the healing path... But whatever your calling (or callings) are, you must find for yourself.

I was struck by your talking about "being able to smell it." We all have different ways of experiencing things, but I remember hearing one old woman talking about "Ol' Death was there, I could smell him" the day before someone died. Whatever name we put to it, a lot of people, including myself, have felt a presence of some kind that is hanging around before a soul passes.

It is a universe full of mystery, and I am happy that we experience the mystery in a personal way that others may not be so sensitive to.

Hope to see you in these posts again. Good journey.

Stormtree

I can see different colour auras too. I could see the aura of a teacher at one school and I new she was pregnant by the colour of her aura. She told me a few weeks later she had just found out she was pregnant. I guess every colour means a different thing. Good Luck on strengthening your abilites.

Empathy is one of the hardest gifts to deal with, no matter what people say. It is almost impossible to understand, UNLESS you're the one suffering it. The Vendettas who have it absolutely hate it when someone says "Oh, I totally get what you mean" Why? Because they don't. Because they cannot, simply CANNOT see how hard it is to live in the shadows of other's emotions if you are ungrounded. So, of course, it's annoying and it brings solitude.
***

I am Vali. I am an empath and my best spoken language is...emotion. All of my ways of talking, papers at school, and even ways to think, are done with or on emotions. Life has been pretty hell-ish until a few years ago. Now I can talk about it, and I don't feel abandoned and alone anymore...or...not as much. Since emotions are actually the most important and dominatory part of a person, (NOT the "mind" as many believe) they are well connected to the thinking process.

So every now and then, empaths can "read minds." Most empaths see auras. I rarely do. It's better to say, I DON'T. It is truer. Instead, I am able to see a yellow-ish or purple "vibration" around the person. Yellow for normal, deep purple or green for different... I don't know why I can't see auras, I just can't. I love my empathy. It's a gift from God, and I adore it. No matter how hell-bent it can be.
***

Email us at VendettaSiblings [at] hotmail.com for any more questions you may have.

-Vendettas

Yeah, I can definitely connect with you on this one. Not only do I absorb other people's emotions, but I don't even need to know someone to tell what sort of person they are. I can tell what worries them, why it does, the legitimacy of their worries (stereotypes often distort real beliefs, like self-image etc.) and I also know exactly how to address these issues, but at the same time, I can feel their pain myself. Sometimes it's really overwhelming. I can see that little outline around a person too, it's kind of not really clear, but you can kind of feel a colour, but you can feel, or see, a line that is above a person that is different all around them for a certain radius than from their background.

And also, with the whole grandmother things, well, my great-grandmother was Clairvoyant, read tarots and did Ouija boards and stuff with my mother. My mother has seen many ghosts, felt ghost's presences etc, and also had dreams that have come real, as have all of my siblings (and me). Mine tend to be irrelevant and I can't control what happens to me.

Also, if you can smell it, you may have Clairalience (the ability to obtain external, remote knowledge through smell), and also many other gifts. Something that I've learnt is that a person gifted with a psychic ability tends to excel in one ability but has no limitations in having some experience with others. You can develop your abilities further by constantly self-meditating and exploring your self, and also by developing your Chakras and kundalini.

Hey adeleebony,

About auras?
That's the way I see them occasionally
You know how on a hot day, you look over a road or field, and it's wavey?
That's what I see, and I can sort of sense what colour their aura is...
It's weird...
Kids and animals LOVE me - but apart from them, I'm not much of a people person.

My name is Ama, and I can't tell you how... Relieved I felt after reading your message. I have had similar experiences my entire life, I am afraid to talk to people sometimes because I'll feel their energy from a far and know if they speak to me I will be engulfed by it. I have always felt different, older than my peers. My mother told me never to tell anyone in case they decided to 'test' me. I just want to tell you I know what it feels like to not know if your feeling really belong to you. Sometimes I wish I could turn it off.
If you would ever like to talk more, hit me up.
And thanks for making me feel like I am not alone in the world. Lol

Hi, Smell is associated with the root chakra, indicating a connect with a basic primodial instict (grounding I fill). I too get smells to indicate illness, its helful in administer healing, but sometimes its a nusiance since I feel like a blood hound and have to turn it off!
You must know living in England it is full of energy, it is full of ghosts,history,ectoplasm in walls,imprints, its awesome! Plus plenty of places to go for learn more:CPS in South Kensington is one of the places that started Spiritualist movement in England over 100yrs old. Blessings 😁

I have encountered many people who after awhile "assume" the mind set or emotions of the other. Remenber to look inside when you feel encountered. Also remember that you do have a special gift focusing can help you strenghten it.

Hello: Yeah, it can be confusing and uncomfortable to say the least. I can relate to what you describe.