How do I go about this? I'm not very good at explaining myself really, as I keep my thoughts to myself. I've been having things happen to me over a period of time. I had a break from them in life but I think they have come back to haunt me.
It started when I was a child. I was very, very scared of the dark. I could see dark shadows out the corner of my eyes shoot past, or float in front of me in a dark room. I got fed up of them after seeing them for a while and basically told them to get lost. I stopped seeing them altogether after I kept saying this to them. I just had a feeling deep inside that they knew, they did not scare me anymore.
Once on an upstairs landing, I saw a silvery outline of a shoulder, arm and head reaching out to touch me. It felt an electric shock and sharp, coldness through my body, every single hair on my body stood on end. It felt harmless, but seeing it still frightened me. I ran. I was about 12 at the time - I blamed puberty.
I have seen something in a graveyard like a monk, it looked straight at me. I knew what it was but next day - you shake it off as something else. Denial.
I used to hear whispers, I see red, I used to scare my mum as I told her one day and I pointed in a direction, told her something was going to happen. On the night in the direction I pointed my relatives house is there - my mums brother had died. Mum refused for me to tell her stuff from then on.
I know sometimes when the phone rings, who it will be. Same with what people will say next.
I'm sure I can feel others feelings and sense emotions from people who are not here.
All this disappeared - blocked out - part of growing up I guess.
I'm now older and last year my mum died. I have thought about a lot of things over the months: my mum, my family, me, the past, the present and future. Mainly opened that door in my mind which I have stuffed and kept things locked in.
Now, I have started hearing stuff. It was just voices, like snippets - little whispers. I'm sure it's a little girl's voice. I felt my mattress go down at the bottom of my bed by my feet, but it wasn't scary, it felt calm to me - so I didn't look I went back to sleep.
I have also seen little pin-pricks of light. Some flash then disappear. Some stay there. I try to blink it away but it won't go. Some are pure white, silver, blue, green and yellow. I've seen static patches, circles like I've read about here - I've never heard of them before. Thoughts have popped into my head when I've needed them. Good thoughts.
I feel also like I'm being watched now and again, like there's someone there. The lights have been flickering now and again. I've started to see the shadows again out the corners of my eyes. My daughter's also seen them. I have not told her anything about them. This made me feel a lot saner.
I've felt cold spots, even while the fire's on. Photographs in the house have orbs in them. I've smelt flowers, cookies, perfume, burning, nasty smells too. I am sure to I have also smelt my mum.
All these things I've not just had in the house - I have had them at different places.
Is it because I miss my mum - my mind's playing tricks on me? I need you to tell me as this is not my field.
I used to be able to tell when it was raining before it rained back then but that ability ceased for now.
Just wondering.