When I was young I had occasions where I would have what I thought were nightmares, where I would wake up and something would be holding me down and I couldn't move. I talked to my grandmother about it, who was a psychic, (Carol Dawn) she said I may be spirit traveling while I sleep. It got more intense when I was 19. I was already married pregnant with my 2nd child, my husband was suffering from Paranoid schizophrenia, I had quite the chaotic life. I wasn't sure if I was awake or asleep when it was happening, but I was in my bed dressed next to my husband being held down. I'd see lights sometimes and even hear strange noises from time to time. I'd try to move and grab my husband's arm to get his attention but I never could.
When I was 20 my husband and I moved to be closer to his family in Chicago, during that time I went through a lot, I was kidnapped, my husband was shot and killed. I had nightmares for years. The kind of nightmares that left you standing screaming in your bed in the middle of the night.
Again my life got worse I went through 6years of spouse abuse. It started again after I left my husband, only now I had the clock faced to where I could see it at night when it happened and I'd look at the clock in "my dream" then when I woke up it would be the same time as it was in my dream. It was usually around 3am when it happened.
The night before the 2004 Tsunami I had intense visions. I saw water splashing, and a giant pit of bodies sinking into a pit. Then the side of a pregnant woman's belly that had a hole in it and water was pouring out of it. Then I saw a creature without flesh scratch at an invisible barrier.
Here recently it's gotten so bad I'm having seizures and I'm not epileptic. I've been to a lot of specialists. It literally feels like my life is being drained from me at night. I'm going for a sleep study but I don't know that medical doctors can help with this situation.
When I sleep different places it effects me differently. I slept at my mom's in one of the kids rooms and saw a golden light and felt some sort of strange vibration. The night before I had slept at my mom's in her room and saw very clearly a girl standing next to my boyfriend. She didn't look like a ghost she wasn't transparent at all. It looked as though she were trying to wake him up and then I heard in my head, the living can't get his attention, so how could the spirit world get his attention.
One night I stayed at my cousins and when I woke up I heard a couple arguing and over what at first I thought was the man's daughter, but then realized was his mother, I got up and my cousin was asleep and her husband was in the living room playing with their son. About a week later 150 miles from where I heard it my sister and her husband got into a fight about his mother and they separated for a while.
The hard part is, things are different at my apartment I feel my energy being drained. My boyfriend works over nights so I sleep alone. My kids room is on the opposite side of the apartment. This is a lot of information and I'm probably not putting it together very well due to lack of sleep and seizure meds but I thought I'd give it a shot.
As for my religious background, I'm VERY educated in theology along with other religious views. I've been baptized and saying "Get thee behind me Satan, or leave in Jesus name!" doesn't help. To be honest though. When I was waking up at 3am being held down feeling like I was being attacked, I would call out, "God please forgive me of my sins and help me." and I would be released. If your religious you might believe it was God who helped me if you're not you might believe it was my submission to a higher power in general that released me or that I somehow psychologically was able to return to reality because I believed I would because of some sort of dependence or belief in a higher being. I'm very open minded about religion, philosophy, but I believe science and psychology can't explain everything.
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