Ever since I was little I've had dreams that seem like mini prophecies. Nothing fancy mind you, just little things like who I would meet the next day and how to handle interaction with that person. Or dreams to tell me what I did wrong that day and teach me moral lessons like "Don't take your brother's toys and smack them over his head" I used to see shadow people walking around and through walls. I also saw demons attached to people's backs. I saw angels surrounding some people and angels trapped in little cages tormented by minuscule demons prodding them until they bled. I asked my mom about them and she said to stop making things up and started saying prayers (which I was later to learn that my mom could not see the things but heard them. Her brother saw the spirits.) I asked other people and they told me to stop lying, that I was crazy, or the a demon was inside me making me see these things.
When I was eight years old, during the time my mother was divorcing my biological father after he tried to murder my two little brothers who were only 8 months and 4 years old at the time, I just prayed to be normal. For the most part I live with that illusion, and it is a weak shield. Since then I've developed my shields to be more reflective: the concept behind them is to keep them fluid and always moving. When someone or something sends a psychic probe towards me, the shield automatically catches it circles it back and reflects whatever preconceived image the person had of me to begin with. If they are strangers, I appear boring and "normal." If they get past that one, then I appear powerful, angelic, and indifferent or loving. At least that is what my wiccan friends have told me who don't buy the "normal" reflective shield. Truthfully neither one is really me.
I am a strong empath and had to keep shields up constantly. It is like breathing for me. When I was young my dead maternal grandfather did it for me until I learned how to maintain my own. I'm not telling you this as a boast, but more as a responsibility and reluctant acceptance of facts. You see I'm human and though I try to be happy and project love and joy most days. Sometimes I'm sad and depressed and I just jack up my shields and don't let those around me pick it up. It still leaks out though and those closest to me sometimes see through the illusions. I've been blessed with loving and understanding people that keep me grounded and optimistic about the future of the world. I know of at least 10 good men and women and know that God will spare the city for their sake. No I have found the most dangerous emotion for me is anger. It is because when I get anger, I don't care if I'm projecting or not and everyone around me with weak shields tend to get angry too, even if I don't say or do anything but sit there and think angry thoughts. It takes intense meditation to calm back down. I do this by listening to the music of the trees, dancing in the sunshine/moonbeams or just taking a few deep breaths.
The positive side of being an empath is that when I meditate I can "check up" on my friends and families emotional states. In my mind I envision a string that leads from my heart to theirs and I ask their angels if everything is ok. Sometimes they tell me to call and that my friend really needs a person to talk to.
I've been waken up from a dead sleep a few nights to talk to some of my friends on facebook or AIM. Eventually during the conversation at 2 or 3 am they mention their thoughts of suicide and depression or experiences with demonic forces. I have prayed and I asked God what is going on and an angel comes and tells me that darkness hates light and will try and extinguish it where ever they find it.
The majority of my battles with darkness are in the dream realms or through mental battles and fought through words and help from angelic forces. They tend to involve me teaching specific people how to build shields and escorting them to sanctuaries through various spirit gates. A lot of it is symbolic representations of various troubles and trials the person I meet the next day needs help understanding and dealing with at that moment of their life. It has happened over and over again in my life and is almost a nightly and daily occurrence that I tend to forget that its not quite "normal." I guess I take it for granted that God speaks to everyone through dreams and guides their life accordingly. Most of my life I've had an angel standing beside me watching and then later explaining to me what the meaning and right course of action to handle sticky situations.
However, there are a few times when demons attacked me during my waking moments. Actually they don't so much attack me as attack my loved ones in my presence. Like I stated earlier I tend to try and appear normal and boring to most people with powers and creatures without bodies. List of experiences:
A friend cast out a demon into a tree, and a squad of angels came down and cast it into a pit
Stalked by an energy vampire in the bookstore and other college experiences with the supernatural
Demon of pride stalking a family: wife is the Sunday school director, husband is the head deacon and son convicted of molesting a teenager during Sunday school. Whisperings of murder through neglect.
Army of Cherubim marching; A prayer answered for cleansing of the church: news reports three days unexpected rainfall
*Email me questions and perhaps when I get a chance I'll submit the stories. I'm dealing with voices of the dead now.
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