Uncertain What's Happening

This is probably a longer story than usual. I don't remember specifics before I was nine, but I was happy. We suddenly moved two hours away and I shut down completely. This has bearing on my being a Sensitive in that, when I was older, my instincts and intuition roared to the surface. I intuitively knew things, but not very often. It was especially erratic when I was awakening out of the time I froze everyone out, but I distinctly remember having a prophetic dreams twice that came true. By seventeen, I was cleansing and warding my living spaces. My intuition leveled out, my instincts calmed down, though they are still in full force. Part of my Sensitivity is some awareness of the souls of the dead. I was named for my fathers' mother, who died long before I was born, and I have never had trouble invoking her assistance (probably because of being her namesake). When I was thirteen, my mothers' Dad died. It was several years before I even thought of invoking his help 9 when I say invoke, I usually mean asking for guidance and protection), and after my elderly dog was put down when I was sixteen, I haven't been able to call her for comfort very often. At eighteen, I predicted my mothers' brothers' death, and vaguely the breakdown of my parents' relationship. I think my exact words were "Three lives will hang in the balance before ______'s kid is born" Now, I actually spoke my uncles' name, but it was the metaphorical deaths of my parents lives together that I predicted, I think. Anyway, I couldn't call on his help either. My Dad's brother passed away last winter, and only in the past month and a half have I even had the urge to call on him.

The reason all this is so important is that a classmate of mine died recently. I received the news last week, and returned to my parents house (they reconciled within six months of the breakup) this week. I'm in the same room I warded at 18. My wards here have obviously deteriorated, because while I was slightly uncomfortable due to his presence before I came home, he's almost constantly in my thoughts or awareness now. O never knew how much my wards buffered me (they seal so much of an area, and you are only sensitive to what's in that area). Although, he visited at least once, getting through my wards and protective relations. It makes me uneasy, because I have the urge to call on my former classmate almost every day. Considering I have used my life force or 'magic' to cure a physical ailment in a shaman I knew, being uncertain about my abilities is a new one.

I have so many smaller things wrapped up in a Creation gift (I write, can draw, paint, sculpt, act, with varying degrees of success) like lioness instincts and wolf intuition crossed with healing and protecting. I want a mentor of some sort- or even several for help with all aspect- yes, but right now, I'm more interested in why my former classmate is skating the edge of my awareness constantly, when no other person I've ever known who crossed over has. If it helps, we were acquaintances, but he made me laugh when I thought I never would again, and he died as a drunk driver in a single vehicle crash.