When I was in high school, before I lost my abilities, I used to be addicted to dreaming. Every single day, every after school, I would finish all my homework as fast as I could just so I could sleep early. When I finally could, I lie down on my bed and fall into oblivion.
I would enter the dream world. The fun thing on these dreams is that as soon as I realize that I am inside one, I can control it. I can create things and control events. I can even control the four elements or fly. Simply put, I can do whatever I want and be whatever I want to be. As I learned it later on, it was called "Lucid Dreaming".
Although I can control things in my dreams, the dream still has its own plot before I even enter it. It's like a book with a story that I have the courtesy to edit. Yet, there are times that I can't control my dreams, rather part of my dreams that I can't control. Those dreams usually comes to life. Like a deja vu, which I learned later on was called "prophetic dreaming". I also met people that I don't know in real life. Well, I can't tell if If they're real persons or mind generated. And this kept going for months. I was addicted to it. I also think, this kept my abilities on fire. It felt like it's their fuel of some sort. Maybe, it kept my mind on psychic mode.
Anyway, I read about astral projection as I research. One night, I wanted to try it. I lie on the bed and started meditating. I imagined myself floating and getting out of my body. I focused on that thought. There was silence, then I felt like the bed is shaking. I opened my eyes, and I felt and see everything shaking. It's like a high magnitude earthquake. I don't know if it's actually an earthquake or it's me getting out of my body. It's intense, you see. I can't move, but I realized that I still have my voice. I know that my grandma is on the other room, so I shouted, " Grandma! Grandma! Is there an earthquake?! The bed is shaking! Grandma!" She answered but I did not understand what she said, then she opened the door of my room. Then everything stopped shaking, my head hurts big time, and all I can hear is a high pitch note. As it subsides, I can finally hear her. She was asking me what is it. I asked her if there was an earthquake. She told me there was none.
After that event, I got fewer and fewer lucid dreams. Maybe that event damaged a part of my psychic self. Maybe, I'm pacing too fast and I needed to slow down. Maybe it was too intense for me. It was too intense, that fear crept on my mind. I don't know. But I think it's really fear that blocks abilities.
The night when I lost telepathy and telekinesis, luckily I sort of kept lucid dreaming. But unlike before, that I can lucid dream everyday, it became very occasional, like once a month, to once every three months. Now, I'm lucky if ever I had one in half a year.
Still, I believe that it'll come back to me. A word of advise: Take it slow. Don't fear. Keep dreaming.
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