I really would like some answers on this. For reference, I'm 17 years old now.
I'm not spiritual, I don't strongly believe in these so-called "psychic experiences". However, something came over me this morning and I Googled stories about accidental manipulation. I read a few stories on this site and decided to post my own experiences. There's a somewhat long backstory, so please sit back and read it all.
This all really started before I could remember. I was diagnosed with medium to high functioning autism as a toddler. Even so, I could sort of project my will against others and most of the time, they would oblige. I somehow instinctively knew how to appeal to them. Usually this would involve marginalizing whatever my endgame was and exaggerating the good effects of it. Of course this would vary person to person. I may have done this more than I remember.
There are a few instances where at home I would look up at the room and it would be filled with light, or I suppose "auras" emanating from every object in it. I don't remember these experiences well, but I came to understand the light reflected the sort of karma behind the object. I could sometimes even see the manufacturing process and the people that made an object. Of course, I had no idea if I was right and there was no way of finding out if I was. I dismissed all of this as my imagination and all but forgot it.
Grade school years were odd. I went through some terrible depression. I had anger management, I was in social counseling from the school, on antidepressants and other crap. It was a rough time, and I retreated into fantasy books. Often when I looked up from the books I could see the auras, but less of them than before. I ignored them.
My life completely flipped around in 7th grade, where I went through a series of bizarre events possibly more suited for the spiritual experiences pages. In the midst of a severe tantrum I calmed myself, sat down, and meditated. Just like that, my first time trying, all the way down to sub-ego level. I haven't been able to do it since. But I could see myself, my own aura. It was yellow, orange, and red. Basically, in one sentence, I came to the conclusion I was the cause of my own unhappiness, my aura changed to a more purpley color and I woke up. The entire process took about 15 minutes.
Maybe a week later (still 7th grade) I got better. If autism was your brain sleeping, then I woke up. I was walking in the middle of the quad at school when I felt like I had been struck in the head. Everything went a pure white. I fell forward and remember seeing the ground rushing up to meet me. I open my eyes and I see my body standing, surrounded by the white. I blink and I'm back in my body, facing the opposite direction, approximately west. On the horizon I can see a great ball of light shrinking, surrounded by circling stars. As the white fades from my vision and my hearing returns, I look and see the sun is almost directly overhead. I don't believe in a God or Gods, but I felt like I had been given a second chance. I ask my friends who were walking with me and asked if anything had hit my head. They said no, that I had just stopped walking. I noticed all colors were more vivid, as if I had been given new eyes.
The next few months I learn how to be a normal kid. I felt like I had to teach myself social norms, how to behave and act, etc. My tantrums stopped, and I could finally reason; before, I could never contemplate results of my actions and it had gotten me in serious trouble on more than one occasion. I felt as if up until that point my life had been crammed into maybe 10% of what my brain had become. I finally felt like I was normal, but I also felt scared that I might be acting strange to others. But time went by and nobody said a word. A scientific approach might be that a major neurological connection between two parts of the brain had finally connected. Who knows... All I know is I got better, and my memory had improved a thousandfold.
Anyways. A couple weeks after the star-struck event I stopped seeing auras. I had pretty much blocked them out already, so this was fine for me. They had been distracting. I forgot about them until now...
It all really started again this summer, about 4 years later. I walked into a skate/clothing shop early one morning looking for a helmet for my friend, Max, who was with me. That day there was going to be a big festival that ran along directly outside the store. She started lamenting the fact the festival would kill business that day. Her name was Johanna. As we all (Max, Johanna and I) talked I got this feeling about her that I couldn't drop. It came out of nowhere, but it was that she had a really rocky childhood, something to do with her dad, possibly in the military. I shook the idea and we left the store.
Max and I came back to the store to do an interview. I'm interested in going to film school, and I was doing a project over the summer that needed interviews from people that lived in California. Johanna was still there, and she obliged. In the interview I asked where she lived before, and she said she had been living on a military base in Washington. She started to get uncomfortable and directed the question elsewhere. Later, I asked Max if he had gotten the feeling that she was depressed and he said he didn't. After all, how could he? Johanna acted exuberant. Based on what she said my instinct seemed to be right about her, but once again I forgot about it.
I started thinking back and realized that I could always tell when people were hiding information, even through texts. I knew when I wasn't getting the whole picture. And before relationships, even if I had never spoken to the person, I could tell they would be interested in me later. I knew they liked me before they liked me. And now, if I think of a friend I associate a color with them. When I look up the color on aura-related websites it describes them almost perfectly.
So I'm at a loss and I'm not sure what to think. Let me know what you guys think about the various stories. I'd like to improve my ability reading people and learn a little more about those auras too. Thank you for reading!
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When reading your post, even tough it was posted for almost two years ago, I felt intimetely exposed, since for me, my childhood flipped at a certain point making me, from extra sensitive without the ability to cope with the letdowns induced by seeing intently where a less then optimal solution is 'chosen' to a state where I could both accept my observations as the functioning logic of the truth and still approach it the other way around by following people's logic and assuming it the most optimal starting point as of that moment for that particulair person.
As someone diagnosed with the syndrome of aspergers, even though I might on multiple occasions dissagree with its insinuations, I feel this is an extraordinary way of giving my (instinct, natural state of being) an outlet to the 'real (human!) world'.
As described before, this crevace I installed in myself would help me cope with the incoherence of everyday life, people telling me one thing while obviously obliviously needing something else! This crevace has given me a lot to learn, and has given me space to explore (using my natural curiosity and stubbornness, while being open minded) all input and all possible observations, without deeming them illogical while maintaining a sence of purposeful perseverance.
This crevace has made my life both easier, and a lot harder, as at this moment I intent to grow closer to an allround accepting human being, automatically seizing to exist on a plane of prejudiced interaction and thereby experiencing the world around me as-is, instead of as-described!
I hope that the reader may find resonance with this logic, as for me as a child it was the only way for my confidence to grow while, on two parallel tracks, being aware of the limitless possibilities and therefore the possible connections between (two) extremely different perspectives!
As on auras and spirituality, this fundamental personal duality I have been so conscious of made me able to grasp the logic behind two so different of perspectives. I guess ever since I was born I have known that mankind doesn't barely adequately address anything, simply because of seeing their focal point to be the only truely beneficiary one.
To me, people have always been see-through in the ways of intention, only being made more difficult by perpetually everyone's ignorance on the topic and following my subsequent habitual disagreement with whatever I observed, leaves me completely agitated and emotionally full, just by witnessing such duality in such a naive way! (I have had perplex states of contradicting signs within myself, which I tend to mend using the underlying logic of it all.) I have often had the pleasure of not judging myself when firsthand witnessing peoples rhythm, as I call it, simply by an immensely well focused deed of observation, exactly when a person skips from one mood into another, thereby flowing through his or her own emotional/physical standing, telling me everything about that person, their losses, their ability to grasp metaphorically elusive subjects and mostly their awareness of external input!
So yes, seeing auras can tell you a lot about a person. But for me, being a mechanically thinking person, as this was the first logic not meddled with throught naivity and or inadequateness, (since technology in this case simply will not perform nor feign to perform;) ), it was very hard to comprehend but merely incorporate this way of obtaining knowledge, while still maintaining my own state of awareness. I am aware that no perspective of being aware planet-wide is the same, and in that way no one will ever be able to tell you how to categorize your logic so that you will understand or tolerate your observations, but having observed people from a third person's perspective for a long time, I have concluded that one individual awareness or perception should have no role to play in ways of interacting with oneself or one another. As oneself learns more about their own fatality, programmed by their own subconscious when refusing to audit ones ideas, or clinging to it with all dear might, one becomes aware of the underlying logic behind it all, something that is not to be bothered with words, neither is to be reached through actions, but will sustain one willing to let go of all misconceptions and willing one to be aware of all minutous happenings unconditionally no matter what the history.
My own spiritual path follows the way of letting go of all logic, while returning to the stem of it all perpetually. In this way I sense to explore the past and future, as ways of coping with the duality of it all, while maintaining the now to be a means of balance.
My sincerest, hearthly obliged well-wishes to any resonees on this planet!
Olivier,
Amsterdam,
12-07-2016