This isn't a story about a relationship gone bad after all everyone's been through heartbreak but feel I should explain the situation prior to my experience happening.
I broke up with my ex partner just over 3 and a half months ago, he was the love of my life but for 18 months previous to the break up he put me through hell, lying, cheating etc. In this time I went through every emotion under the sun. When we broke up we had been doing fine, looking for a new apartment and getting on brilliantly but he just packed up and left over night with no explanation, I haven't seen or heard from him since and spent a lot of time in emotional agony but have moved on and felt so much better and like myself again over the past 3 weeks.
A couple of nights ago as I was sleepily getting ready to go to bed and just as I finished brushing my teeth a wave of intense guilt came over me, it just hit me out of nowhere it was almost physically painful, I led on my bed curled up foetus style with tears rolling down my face trying to figure out where this emotion came from and why it was happening, it was the most intense emotion I have ever felt but what's more is that somehow I knew these emotions weren't my own.
This went on for approx 15 minutes then they left just as quick as they arrived, I was confused and in shock, I've never experienced anything like that and I don't know if the emotions were those of my ex partners or someone else's.
Prior to getting ready for bed, I had been casually flicking through a magazine, I was happy and relaxed and not thinking about anything In particular.
I would like to know if anyone else has ever had a similar experience, got any advice or has an opinion on this as to be honest this shook me to the core.
Thanks in advance for any comments. J x
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I need to let you know that I 100% believe you and know what your going through, you have near enough have explained the exact situation that I'm in, the only difference is that I don't have any contact with my ex.
I do indeed feel his emotions in my heart centre and he is also someone who suffers from anxiety and depression!. I too struggled to release the feelings or hurt and resentment that I had towards him and had help from an energy healer to let go, the funny thing is that only since I've let go and started to move on have I started to feel this connection.
You said you get feelings of longing, do you feel that these are emotions are directed at you personally and do you ever feel overwhelming negative emotions from him?. Maybe he has regrets and a deep sadness that hes holding on too?!? I'm not sure whether my ex is thinking about me at the time or whether its just his general state of mind at the time that I'm picking up on.
I went for nearly a week after taking the advice of my energy healer and someone else who commented on my post to meditate and see in my minds eye myself severing the cords that connect us, I thought this had worked and I was getting back to normal however over the past four days or so I've felt him more often, stronger and for longer, I've had connections with people before but they were very light nothing as strong and overwhelming as this.
The other night I woke from my sleep with an overwhelming sense of panic, I sat on my bed for a few minutes just trying to breathe through it, I knew instantly it wasn't me but couldn't push it away, I ended up sitting in the garden for well over an hour, it left me exhausted. Only yesterday I was at work typing away when this deep emotion of sadness tinged with regret washed over me, I sat there with tears streaming down my face, my colleagues obviously concerned asked me what was wrong, am I ok etc I had to answer that I didn't know why I was upset! I wasn't about to explain that what I was feeling weren't my own emotions, they would of sent the straight jackets in!. This carried on for about 20mins or so then left abruptly, I felt fine after though slightly worried about what I had felt.
I've tried to talk to my mum and friends about this, they are of the opinion that I going mad, still trying to hold on to him, depressed or maybe even have a mental illness, I don't expect them to understand as they have never experienced it and I'm so glad I found this website because if I hadn't by now I would surely be questioning my own sanity.
I will always care about my ex and this has made me worry about him, I do want him to sort out his issues and eventually be happy, he hurt me a lot but I'm not one for hating anyone although what I went through was incredibly painful I have learnt not to hold on to my negative emotions, I believe we all have our own paths in life and our own issues to overcome however like yourself I don't want to be connected to him, if you find out any ways to break this connection I would be grateful if you would share them with me.
Good luck and take care:-)