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Coping with Being an Empath

Being an empath doesn’t mean we can’t take care of ourselves and set boundaries. I have spent many a year working on how to cope with this kind of sensitivity. I’m in my 40’s now and I’ll share some of what I’ve come to terms with. One is to set boundaries with “takers” whether those people are asking for money, time, or energy. I am not implying not to help people, not at all, but I’m talking about the people who just sap you over and over like a vampire. Kindly let them know you’ve given what you can and they will have to deal with their issues on their own. This doesn’t make you a bad person; it makes you a mature one. I set boundaries all the time with people who would literally suck me dry. Let the guilt go and take care of yourself. When you do this, you’ll be better served in the long run to help those you wish to and not be utterly sapped of energy. Stay clear of drama kings and queens. Some people not only thrive on chaos and drama, but want you as a part of that. That’s an express ticket into misery so pick your friends and associates wisely. Learn the word “no”.

Second, always make time for you, whether it’s fishing, gardening, walking or a ‘time-out’ in a hot bathtub with a candle. We need downtime to smooth out our energies. This is very important because our energy is like cash and we have to be careful how it is spent. I also highly recommend finding time for some nature in your life. For some that is very difficult because they live in a city, but even New York has Central Park. We are not only humans but part of this earth, and we have gotten so disconnected that we’ve lost that natural healing that occurs when we are in or near nature. I am lucky in that I live in Washington State and am very close to mountains, the beach, rivers and forest but most of us can make a trip to this if it’s not close at hand.

I’ve heard people ask, “How do I block these energies?” Energies are like radio waves in that you can’t block them out, but you can refuse to tune into them. Turn off the radio, tv, computer and occasionally the cell phone! An empath needs more silence than others. Hopefully you’re not the type that needs noise to not feel lonely and can allow silence into your life. And related to silence, remember to meditate.

An empath may need to make bigger choices about where they live, with whom, and what they do for a living. I was originally from central California and then moved to southern California. I found those energies to be way too hectic for me. That led to a big decision that I felt had to be made: what reflects me? What is more in tune with who I am as an empath? That answer ended up being Washington state. I saved my money, quit my job and moved to an apartment that bordered a state park full of evergreens and a block from the un-crowded beach. That was about 20 years ago and I’ve never regretted that decision. I now live on two and a half acres in a log home with a lovely organic garden. This decision applies to people and work too. I know for the parents out there you can’t pick your children, but you can still set healthy boundaries and ask for some consideration with noise level.

And last, be mindful of your body because mind and body are linked. A stressed out energy depleted body is going to lead to the same condition in the mind. Jacking yourself up on chemicals and junk food will fray the mind and splinter your energies.

In summary, pick your environment and people, embrace nature and silence, and you’ll find yourself thriving like a well watered plant in the sunshine.

Anne